Vulnerability and Intimacy: Interview #2: The Secrets to a Happy Second Marriage

What you are about to hear is an interview of a couple, Paul and Michelle, who have been remarried for less than 5 years and they are raising four children from Michelle’s first marriage.

Successful remarried couples accept that there are inevitable ups and downs in remarried life and they adopt realistic expectations. Love is a wonderful feeling, but you have to make a conscious decision to love your partner every day through actions – such as small gestures and displays of love and affection. In order for a complicated remarriage or stepfamily to thrive, it must be nurtured.

The best way to beat the odds and to see your second marriage succeed is to risk being vulnerable with your partner so you can repair conflicts and making your marriage a priority. Determination, respect, acceptance, patience, and having a good sense of humor can go a long way to improving your chances of success the second time around.

Visit me at where you will find free blogs and be able to order Daughters of Divorce. You can also visit Movingpastdivorce on Facebook and Twitter.

Vulnerability and Intimacy: Episode 1: Bring Yourself to Love: Achieving Vulnerability and Intimacy in Marriage and Remarriage

My guest today, Mona Barbera, is a psychologist and a Internal Family Systems Therapist who counsels couples. In this interview, she’ll describe “Giving Better Back,” a practical tool couples can use when they are most upset with their partner. Mona explains that when he or she is critical, judgmental, or unreasonable, you can respond with more calm, clarity, and compassion than you are getting and change negative patterns of relating.

In Bring Yourself to Love, Mona says, “As I like to tell my clients, if it’s intense, it’s your own.” She suggests that when you deal with your own internal pain, you won’t be so immersed in it and your partner won’t easily trigger an intense reaction when they do something that hurts or disappoints you.

You can order Dr. Barbera’s powerful book Bring Yourself to Love on Amazon.

Daughters of Divorce Episode 5: Overcoming the Legacy of Your Parents’ Divorce

In this episode, our guest who is a daughter of divorce, examines her parents’ divorce and her attitudes and beliefs about love and commitment. While adult children of divorce have double the risk of divorce compared to counterparts from intact homes, they can learn from their parents’ failed marriage and gain confidence in their ability to find lasting love.

The key to doing this is self-awareness, willingness to examine your parents’ divorce from an adult viewpoint, and making a decision to trust yourself and others. Realize that you don’t have to define yourself by your parents’ marriage or breakup – you can learn from their failed marriage. People who enjoy healthy relationships have learned that it’s no longer up to others to help them break the cycle of negativity and find happy, long-lasting love.

Visit Terry at where you will find free blogs and be able to order Daughters of Divorce. You can also visit her on Facebook and Twitter.

Daughters of Divorce Episode 4: Mistrust Isn’t Always Related to Cheating

In this episode, Terry interviews Alyssa, a 36 year old married mother of three children who mistrusts her husband, Jake, in spite of his trustworthy behavior. Alyssa has ongoing challenges with overcoming mistrust stemming back to her parents’ divorce when she was a child. She understands the root of her mistrust and has the courage to stop it in its tracks.

Alyssa’s story is an inspiring one for all of us, and we are all capable of changing for the better like she did. It’s crucial to decide to build trust in intimate relationships if you want to find lasting love. Rather than always taking a reactionary stance, try to operate from a viewpoint that your partner wants the best for you and won’t abandon or hurt you. Let your partner prove, through word and deed, that he or she is trustworthy.

Visit Terry at where you will find free blogs and be able to order Daughters of Divorce. You can also visit her on Facebook and Twitter.

Daughters of Divorce Episode 3: When Mistrust Causes You to Fear Intimacy and Commitment

In this episode, Terry interviews Elizabeth, a 39 year of single mom who mistrusts men due to her father leaving her mother when she was a child. A nearly universal struggle for women who come from divorced homes is the inability to trust their partners. As children, their parents’ breakup taught them that relationships will end badly. Because of their past experience, daughters of divorce may approach relationships warily and have come to expect the worst.

Mistrust can come in many forms, from suspecting partners of infidelity, to fearing that they will abandon you emotionally or physically. Some women, like Elizabeth, freeze out the option of finding love, for fear of being hurt. Others become “relationship junkies” looking for partners to be the salve for their wounds.

To find out more about how to overcome trust issues order Terry’s book Daughters of Divorce.

Daughters of Divorce Episode 2: The Father-Daughter Relationship: How to Heal the Wounds Created by Divorce

Accepting and forgiving your father can help you heal any wounds that exist and improve your relationships.

In this episode, Tanya, a daughter of divorce who is 34 and married with two children, explains how she was able to heal a wound with her father that existed because he was absent from her life after her parents’ divorced. Listen and learn why Tanya left her dream life in California to come back to the East Coast to reconcile with her father when he became very ill. Tanya tells us how understanding, accepting, and forgiving her father helped her heal the rift between them. It has also given her the courage to trust others and forge healthy relationships.

To find out more about how to heal a father-daughter wound order Terry’s book Daughters of Divorce.

Daughters of Divorce Episode 1: How to Keep Real Intimacy and Love Alive in Your Marriage

In this episode, Julia, a daughter of divorce who has been married for five years, explains how real love means risking occasionally getting your feelings hurt; it’s a price you have to pay for intimacy because you and your partner are being open and vulnerable with each other. She explains how conflict will happen and differences don’t have to lead to breakup. Relationship expert Terry Gaspard offers solutions to resolving trust and intimacy issues and discusses the importance of apologizing and forgiveness to repairing disagreements. She tells you how to embrace vulnerability, learn from your experience, and keep love and intimacy alive in your marriage.