A Lawyer’s Tips for Keeping Your Divorce Records Private

Unless your last name ends in the word “Kardashian” you’re probably not a big fan of making a public scandal out of your private life. Like it or not, though, your divorce records will be public. Because of that, it’s worth investing some time and energy into making sure that those rA Lawyer’s Tips for Keeping Your Divorce Records Private

Unless your last name ends in the word “Kardashian” you’re probably not a big fan of making a public scandal out of your private life. Like it or not, though, your divorce records will be public. Because of that, it’s worth investing some time and energy into making sure that those records aren’t scandalous.

Why Your Divorce Records Matter

Thinking about “the public record” when you’re in the middle of a divorce isn’t easy. Your head is already spinning, your heart is shredded, and your entire world is falling apart. Keeping your private life out of public divorce records is just not your #1 priority at that point.

Yet, it matters – and not just if you ever plan on running for public office.

Employers today routinely run background checks on job applicants. While you may think that a potential employer clearly won’t care about your past marital history, if that history includes allegations of domestic abuse, adultery, alcoholism, or addiction, you better think again.

Even if you are a model citizen, that doesn’t mean you don’t have to worry about anything in your divorce. Contested divorces can get ugly very fast. People (especially spouses embroiled in a divorce war) often say things in court documents that are less than 100% true.

Lawyers are paid to spin facts into arguments that support their case. They can take true facts and weave them into a presentation that paints a very different picture of reality than the one you remember.

The problem is that once something is in writing in a court record, it usually stays there forever.

But My Spouse Lied!

Hopefully, if your spouse lies about you in a court document, you will be able to prove your innocence. But many times you never get the chance.

In divorce, what often happens is that one party files a petition claiming that his/her spouse did all kinds of horrible things. Before the judge rules on the petition, the case is settled. So the only thing in the court file is the petition with all of the horrible allegations in it. No one ever knows whether the allegations were true or not.

Other times, the judge may actually hold a hearing on the petition. Assuming the judge finds in your favor, s/he will enter an order that says, “Petition denied.” Often, that is ALL it says. There is no detail about WHY the petition was denied.

Was the petition denied because it wasn’t true? Was it denied on a technicality? No one knows.

Now the truth is that you are supposed to be presumed innocent until proven otherwise. Just because your ex filed court papers claiming that you were the devil incarnate, that doesn’t mean it’s true.

But human beings make a lot of assumptions. And many human beings assume (wrongly) that if anything is in a public document, it MUST be true. (Just like it must be true if you read it on the internet!)

Are All Divorce Records Public Information?

Courts in the United States are open to the public. Divorce records are public information. Anyone can look at any court file they want, usually whenever they want to look at it.

In the past, that may not have mattered much. Like the Ark of the Covenant that Indiana Jones buried in a government warehouse, finding court documents (especially old court documents) used to be a chore.

Today, though, everything has changed.

In today’s digital, hyper-connected world, it is relatively simple for anyone to access someone’s divorce court records. If you’re not technologically savvy enough to do it yourself, for under $100 you can hire an agency to do a background check on whoever you want.

Employers routinely do background checks on their employees.

If you value your privacy at all (or if you just prefer not to air your dirty laundry in public) what are you supposed to do? How can you keep your private life, private?

2 ways to Keep Your Private Life Out of Public Divorce Records

The problem with divorce is that the only one who can divorce you is a judge. That means that, if you want to end your marriage, at some point you (or your lawyer) has to go to court to do it. You have no other choice.

Since every document you file in court automatically becomes a public record, it might seem that there is no way you can keep your divorce private. To a certain extent, that’s true. No matter who you are, or what you do, if you get divorced, there will be a record of your divorce in court.

But, there is a big difference between filing standard documents with simple “boilerplate” language, and filing motion after motion full of allegations about how your spouse is an alcoholic, and abusive, and has done a whole host of horrible things.
People will always be able to discover that you got divorced. But, if you’re smart, they may not be able to discover much more than that.
Here are two ways you can control your public divorce records:

1. Ask the Court to put your documents under seal.

Filing documents “under seal” is a procedure for keeping sensitive or confidential information out of the public record. While this may sound like the perfect way for you to keep your divorce information private, the truth is that before you can do this, you have to get permission from a judge.

Unless you happen to be wealthy, well-known or well-connected, persuading a judge to seal your divorce court records is not likely to be easy. Judges are responsible for maintaining “the public record.” Most judges take that responsibility very seriously. So, for most average folks, getting their divorce put under seal is just not going to happen.

2. Stay out of court.

If you settle your divorce issues with your spouse outside of court, then the documents you file in court can be fairly “vanilla.” They will contain the information that they absolutely need to contain for legal purposes, and nothing more.
If you and your spouse agree, you can also ask a judge to remove truly sensitive and personal information (especially financial account information, or information that could negatively affect your children) from the court file. Even if you are not rich or famous, a judge is usually willing to grant this kind of limited request to keep certain information private.

(You can also try to remove your personal information from the court file in a contested case. But you will have a much harder time convincing a judge to do that for you, especially if your spouse objects.)

It’s All About What You Know

No matter who you are, you have the power to keep most of your divorce information private. But, like so many other things in divorce, doing so is a choice. The only one who can make that choice is you.
If you want to keep your private life out of the public record, you have to take the steps you need to take to do so. For most people, that means staying out of court.

What’s more, you need to stay out of court from the very beginning of your divorce. Once you have filed reams of paperwork in court, it will be difficult, if not impossible, to get permission to take those documents out of the court file.
Do you care whether your divorce records become public information? Maybe you do. Maybe you don’t. What’s important is that you take the time to answer that question before you get divorced.
Karen Covy is a divorce advisor, attorney, consultant, and coach who is committed to helping couples resolve their disputes as amicably and efficiently as possible. She is the author of When Happily Ever After Ends: How to Survive Your Divorce Emotionally, Financially and Legally and the creator of the Divorce Road Map online program. You can find more of Karen’s articles on marriage and divorce at karencovy.com.

The original version of this article was published at this site: https://karencovy.com/keep-private-life-public-divorce-records/