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Children of Divorce Often Embrace The Abuse They See

By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC When children are exposed to domestic violence in the home, they often mimic the behavior they see or experience. This means the boys often grow up to become abusers, and the girls grow up to marry them. Most mental health experts who work with victims of physical and sexual assault believe

The Pros and Cons of Prenups

Marriage is a beautiful and romantic experience where two people come together, but it is also, functionally, a legal agreement. No one should enter marriage lightly, and though it might “ruin the mood,” both parties should prepare for the worst-case scenario. This article will explain what a prenuptial agreement is, what it can and cannot

How Attachment Style Determines Your Choices in a Partner

By Darlene Lancer, JD, LMFT Your attachment style and degree of individuation determine your partnership choices and relationship satisfaction. The process of individuation—becoming an individual—allows you to meet your needs for both attachment and autonomy necessary for healthy relationships. It starts in the first year of life, as we learn that we’re separate from our

5 Healthy Ways to Fill the Void After Divorce

By Lisa Arends From the chilled and vacant bed to the endless evening hours to the loss of a trusted confidant, the void left in your life after divorce can be both vast and agonizing. The emptiness begs to be filled, the cracks call for smoothing over and you try to distract yourself from staring

6 Ways to Stop Being Defensive with Your Partner

By Terry Gaspard MSW, LICSW During tough conversations, it’s helpful to choose battles wisely and to distinguish between petty issues and important ones. Many experts agree that bickering can lead to the demise of a relationship. It’s like chronic warfare that erodes the quality of a relationship and makes it tough to discuss difficult topics.

8 Ways to Deal with Flooding and Manage Conflict with Your Partner 

By Terry Gaspard MSW, LICSW Many of the couples I counsel find that they fall into cyclical and unhealthy patterns when conflict arises. Fights occur and reoccur that concern the same issues, and often play out in the same ways, with this unfortunate dynamic causing one or both partners to make regrettable comments. For instance,

Divorce Warning Signs – Taking An Honest Look Back

By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC From time to time when talking to clients they tell me they were caught off guard by their divorce. Some even proclaim their spouses left them “one day, without any warning!” I usually respond by asking: is that actually true? Was there really no warning? Upon deeper reflection, in most every

How to Leave a Narcissist or Abuser

When we fall in love, it’s natural to become attached and form a romantic bond. But once in love with a narcissist, it’s not easy to leave, despite the abuse. Although you’re unhappy, you may be ambivalent about leaving because you still love your partner, have young children, lack resources, and/or enjoy lifestyle benefits. Outsiders

7 Steps to Forgiving Your Ex Once and For All

By Terry Gaspard, MSW, LICSW Forgiving others and yourself is infinitely terrifying yet necessary for achieving healthy relationships. It’s about being willing to acknowledge that you are capable of being wounded and able to risk exposing yourself. It also means that you’re stepping out of the role of a victim and taking charge of your

6 Ways To Conquer Your Single Parent Dating Challenges!

By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Dating as a single parent comes with its own set of challenges. Because you’re a parent you must never forget the child in your life, much as you may want to when out in the dating world. Parenting is a life-long responsibility. It doesn’t matter whether your child is with you

Support System: How to Tell Your Loved Ones that You Are Getting a Divorce

When it comes to strong, personal emotions, how we feel inside and other people’s expectations for how we should feel inside don’t usually match up. The relationship you experience and the one that friends and family see at gatherings and other events can often lead friends and family to think that everything is ok, or

Mother’s Day Reflections: 7 Lessons I Learned from My Daughter

By Terry Gaspard, MSW, LICSW Mother’s Day is a perfect time to reflect on how my divorce changed my relationship with my daughter. When I was a young teenager, I used to make lists of the things that I would teach a daughter – if I was lucky enough to have one. Since I’m a

5 Things You Don’t Understand About Divorce Until You’ve Lived Through It

By Lisa Arends I thought I knew about divorce. When I was in elementary school, I weathered my own parents’ divorce, observing their reactions from the sidelines. I felt the loss, the change in family structure. I experienced the strange vacancies of a split – the blank spots on the walls where my dad’s pictures

How Do I Know If Collaborative Divorce Is a Good Option?

Have you been considering divorce and afraid how it can affect your children and finances? You may have been considering a more customized and respectful alternative to traditional adversarial divorce – which is collaborative divorce. Well, there is no denying that collaborative divorce is a great option for the spouses contemplating divorce. But, just because

How are Your Boundaries in the Pandemic?          

Maintaining boundaries is challenging for most of us. But the pandemic has made it even more difficult. People have been quarantined with a partner, housemate, or family for nearly a year. Normally, we could at least create physical boundaries by going to work, the gym, seeing friends, or even taking side trips. All that has