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By Terry Gaspard, MSW, LICSW Elena, 48, and Jason, 52, have been married fifteen years and came to counseling to improve their communication and to stop bickering. Like many couples who I counsel, I asked them both what worked in their marriage and what areas need to...
By Terry Gaspard, MSW, LICSW We’ve all been there: embroiled in an argument with our partner, caught up in emotion, and perhaps most crucially, unsure of how something seemingly small escalated. The touchy topic of who’s “right” and who’s “wrong” in a conflict between...
By Terry Gaspard, MSW, LICSW From the time I started dating at age sixteen, I’ve often found myself attracted to my polar opposite – for better and for worse. Likewise, I’ve counseled many couples who are drawn to their opposite because of strong chemistry but find...
By Terry Gaspard Trust and intimacy form the foundation of a lasting marriage. When couples bring baggage such as infidelity or trauma from the past, it can set the stage for mistrust. That’s why it’s crucial that you allow yourself to be vulnerable and discuss...
Emotional intimacy is the bedrock of an amazing marriage or relationship. Couples who are able to achieve secure attachment and stay emotionally connected are able to risk being vulnerable. Erik, 42, and Amanda, 40, a couple who I counseled recently came to my office...
Learning how to give and accept apologies are an essential ingredient of a strong, healthy marriage. Accepting that you and your mate do the best you can will help you be more understanding. This does not mean you condone his or her hurtful actions. You simply come to...
Terry Gaspard, MSW LICSW By far, this is one of the most commonly asked questions about divorce. The reason why this question is so difficult to answer is because every family is different and one size doesn’t fit all when it comes to divorce. Also, the degree of...
By Terry Gaspard, MSW, LICSW Unfortunately, it’s easy to overlook someone’s faults in the early stage of a relationship. Infatuation and chemistry can prevent us from seeing red flags even if they seem obvious to others. We might fall in love quickly because it feels...
By Terry Gaspard, LICSW One of the biggest problems with ongoing resentment in post-divorce relationships is that it often leads to withdrawal and poor communication. And if you’re bottling up feelings of anger, sadness, or disappointment often, this can lead to...
Dear Terry and Tracy, My mom and dad live thirty minutes away from one another, and want me to spend half the day with each of them on Thanksgiving and Christmas. This happens every year, and every year I dread it. The holidays make me feel like a little kid again,...
Daughters of Divorce
Chapter Excerpts
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