5 Great Ways to Boost Your Self-Esteem After Divorce

By Amanda Wilks

Nothing can be quite as devastating to one’s self-esteem as a divorce. No matter how amicable a parting is or the conditions under which it happens, moving past such a monumental part of one’s life comes with a bevy of lifestyle changes to adapt to and emotional toils to overcome.

The urge to remain sedentary and wallow in a separation might seem overpowering. At the same time, freeing oneself up from another person is a golden opportunity to spend time bettering oneself rather than working on a relationship.

The first step to moving past such a big life change is approaching the coming days with a healthy attitude. Yes, chances are you don’t feel your best. No, the pain won’t pass immediately. The lessons taught by separation are hard to ignore yet taking the right frame of mind forward will only help you in the days to come.

If you’re not sure how to keep yourself feeling chipper and occupied during strange stretches of free time, boosting your self-esteem can be as simple as any of these self-improving tips.


The urge to stay on the couch and feel sorry for yourself is probably going to be a strong motivating factor in the early days after your divorce. This is perfectly natural, but starting a healthy routine instead of settling for less-than-healthy urges can be vital in ensuring you stay active over the long term.

The physical benefits of exercise speak for themselves. The mental benefits, on the other hand, are wide and varied but may not seem obvious to outside viewers. Exercise is proven to help those suffering from depression and anxiety through the release of endorphins paired with changes of scenery and other small touches. You’ll likely manage to sleep better after a day full of exercise, too, which is a benefit in a league all of its own.

2.Take Up a Hobby

Relationships take time. There are very real situations that require a lot of care and attention that draw us away from things we hold near and dear to ourselves, making a period of separation a perfect time to get back into something we once enjoyed or simply explore new hobbies and interests as they come along.

Building social links and promoting healthy time management are but a few upsides to taking on a hobby. If your hobby is one that leads to something tangible through art, gardening, cooking or other creative outlets you just might find that the creation process can help boost your self-worth through reaffirming your ability to create and impact the world around you.

3. Spend Time with Friends and Family

The inertia that comes with becoming your own person can be taken in healthy or unhealthy ways. To make the most of coming to terms with your reclaimed independence, make sure you take time to socialize with those you love in a less romantic context.

Family and friend ties can help keep your stress levels low and having a network of support during a troubling time can be absolutely vital. Try not to let recent events shape your conversations and activities at all times, though: Everyone needs time to just unwind and forget about the world be it through sharing hobbies or going out for a spa day. Let the world take a back seat so your mind can rest whenever possible.

4. Keep Your Diet in Check

If romantic comedies are to be believed, every romantic split ends in someone eating gallons of ice cream without any negative repercussions. To some degree, you’ll probably feel a lessened sense of fulfillment from cooking for yourself and your snacking habits may start to get out of control. Stress eating is often a symptom of emotional toil and a fluctuation in weight can really throw your self-image out of whack.

Like with most diets, try to stay away from eating the cheapest, fastest options you can find. Take time out of your day to prepare proper meals and seek out snacks that aren’t stuffed with fat and excess sugar. Fruits and vegetables are sorely lacking in many a diet, yet their inclusion can ensure you don’t lose out on vital nutrients you need to stay happy and healthy. If you need to eat some comfort food here and there to stay on track as a whole, go for it! Just keep your health goals in mind.

5. Stay Positive

Even if you diet well and keep a healthy attitude you’re probably not going to be the happiest person around. Negative thoughts will come and go yet keeping a positive attitude is one of the strongest ways to ensure your self-confidence stays high. It may sound silly, but thinking negatively often leads to acting in a way that makes those negative perceptions come true.


Divorce isn’t the end of the world. As long as you work towards taking care of yourself and try to keep a positive outlook on life you’ll bounce back from it just as you would any other hardship.

Stay active, keep in touch with friends and try to remind yourself that it’s just another unfortunate part of life. Nothing can stop you unless you stop yourself!

Author Bio: Amanda Wilks is a motivational writer, cooking enthusiast and contributing author for http://thekitchenadvisor.com/. She discovered her passion for gastronomy when she was going through a rough breakup. Back then, cooking was the only thing she would relax her and as the time passed, she grew fond of this new and exciting hobby. Amanda is now taking cooking classes and hopes to become a renowned chef. Learn more about her on Twitter.